“No Mangalsutra, Bindi, Why Would Husband Be Interested”: Judge During Mediation

A sessions judge holding a mediation session for a separated couple told the wife that she was not wearing a “bindi” or “mangalsutra”, asking her why her husband would be interested in her.

In a LinkedIn post shared by Pune-based disputes lawyer Ankur R Jahagirdar wrote that the couple had appeared before the judge for mediation in a domestic violence matter. The judge was encouraging them to resolve the dispute amicably. “I can see that you are not wearing a mangalsutra and bindi. If you don’t behave like a married woman, why would your husband show any interest in you?” the judge asked the woman.

Mr Jahagirdar said that it is disappointing that no recourse exists to raise complaints regarding off-hand remarks by judges. “There is a lot more that happens in the district courts that would shock the conscience of any rational thinking educated person. Unfortunately, I think our society has a baseline tolerance for some outrageous things,” he wrote.

Recounting another such mediation, Mr Jahagirdar wrote that a sessions judge told one of his clients to show some flexibility. As per him, the judge told his client, “If a woman is earning well, she will always look for a husband who earns more than her and will never settle for someone who earns less. However, if a man who earns well is looking to marry, he might even marry a maid who washes utensils in his house. Look how flexible men are. You should also show some flexibility. Don’t be so rigid.”